Eternal Crusade (Episode 97)


A game that never saw the light of day on stream, and few in Grindstone even wanted to talk about. Only Dreskar, Jabber and I have anything to offer up on this limiting, and substandard shooter.


It’s Planetside 2 but Warhammer 40k! Wait let me fix that sentence for you. It’s Planetside 2 but shit with a Warhammer 40k skin pasted on it. Nah I have a better one. It’s Planetside 2 but shit, with small conflicts, no depth, no multi-front conflicts, that takes place on small maps with a Warhammer 40k skin pasted on it.
That will do. This is a game that you shouldn’t play, I know people want a good 40k game, and my god would 40k be fantastic in a Planetside 2 style game but this is not the hill you should die upon. This is the hill you avoid while giving cautious glances over your shoulder at it and shaking your head from the wasted potential before moving on. There will be more great 40k games at some point, but that day hasn’t come yet and so I urge people to simply wait.
If you really want a third person shooter set in the 40k universe, get the fantastic Warhammer 40K: Space Marine and enjoy the game the devs took many of their ideas from.

Recommended?: HELL NO


This is a game with a past.  It started out as “the” definitive Warhammer 40k MMO experience.  It promised several things – dynamic conflicts, planetary control, multiple playable classes and races.  The game was ambitious, and it had the makings of something great.  Fast forward a couple of years and the game goes into early access as little more than a Battlefield-esque third person shooter with the same bog-standard progression of any modern day shooter title, maps that don’t move, a half-assed PVE mode consisting of wave defense or survival Left4Dead style against one enemy faction, and pay-to-win models right on your shop front page.
None of the things that were promised made it to the final game.  What we got was a mostly functional but entirely bland shooter with nothing more than cosmetic Warhammer paint.  The environment and models are done well, the weapons feel shooty, and the sound design works.  It’s just…not great.  It’s not epic Warhammer 40k.  It’s just the same, plain shooting that we’ve come to know out of any modern Battlefield.

Recommended?: NO.


I can’t bring myself to care about Warhammer 40k, and this game sure as shit isn’t going to get me there. I was… kinda looking forward to this initially. No garbage weeaboo grinder to have to deflect the constant defenses of, just simple bang-bang shoot-em-up explosion fun to be had… But my first minute into the game just felt stiff and empty. The tutorial felt like trash. Rather than giving you tips or tasks as you progress, you talk to statues that flash text in your face. Your ammo was stupidly limited for the amount of shots new players needed to bring someone down. It was… well, normally unpleasant to look at, and having no fucks to give to 40k, it didn’t help bring me any closer to wanting to keep playing.
I spent maybe an hour or two a day giving this game some semblance of effort, but just couldn’t bring myself to want to keep playing. The balance felt like trash, the players were mouthy, disruptive and awful. Combat felt clunky and awkward, with terrible levels of feedback. The only thing keeping my interest was the more fun and intriguing cloaking and melee gameplay mechanics of the Eldar’s Striking Scorpion class, and having Dreskar tell me some more lore based things about the Orks that were genuinely amusing, but not reflected in the game itself. Did I sound bored while I was narrating this video? Were you bored watching it? Now you know how I felt playing it.
It’s sad I already have two contenders for “Worst of 2017” and we barely started the year.

Recommended?: Blood for the Blood NO.


Posted on April 30, 2017, in Episodes and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. While I can’t say I was anywhere closer to anticipating this title, I can tell you for certain that now I have no intentions of even looking at it. While my contentions with this game could be as easily summarized as “I just want a fucking jetpack,” there are clearly a lot more deep-seeded problems that stem from the kind of experience it provides. Yes, you could earn the kind of weapons they throw out in the cash shop, but it’s far from rewarding to do so, especially with the shit of watching almost all my hard-earned winnings get funneled into a trust fund for ransom not helping anyone. it WAS cathartic to get to stab the shit out of a mouthy teammate, but that’s not the sort of community I want to either be a part of or help foster. Like Jon, I really want to get into the 40K universe, as it seems like a lot of fun. But this won’t be the game that does it, unfortunately.

    I just hope I can scrub my PC of its entire existence.

  2. Sometimes, don’t you wish you could just be, “it sucks, don’t play it,” and call it a day?

    Also, was there supposed to be no voice over for end credits this time?

    • The “having only 20 seconds” is forcing me to rethink it. At the end of that editing session, I kinda didn’t feel like doing anything about it, so I dropped it.

  3. I had heard…things…about the development of this thing about halfway thru. Mostly about how all of their cash got blown on stuff for the game that got very, very small returns, and how they ended up running out of funds and just dropping what they had on the market before Bamco could tell them to GTFO and pull the plug.

    I tried just not paying attention to the news about this thing, and hoping for the best. “Disappointed” is a word I would use now, but at least I wasn’t riding the hype train, just the “hope train”. It’s a shame, ‘cos as mentioned in the review, the devs had ambition, and the first drips and drabs out from this were promising.

    Oh well. At least some of the alpha/beta testers had some fun with this.
    (that’s from the guys who do the series “If The Emperor Had A Text-to-speech Device, something worth watching if you want to enjoy Warhammer 40k without actually having to “get into it”…and as a comedy)

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